viernes, enero 09, 2009

Update: Proformas varias para futbolistas, versión English

El post anterior desató una oleada inconmensurable de mails de jugadores en trance de irse para el futbol inglés (Have a good trip, Hugh Roll-mare!), galés, jamaiquino o australiano. Considerando esto y la sugerencia de nuestros amigos FidOx y Rubén Darío, además de los aportes de varios de ustedes, liberamos unas versiones en inglés de Proformas para aquellos futbolistas colombianos que tengan la dicha de emigrar a otro pai$ a demo$trar sus talento$. (FidOx y Rubén Darío, tranquilos que les pagaremos con un porcentaje de ganancias en acciones de un bar-grill que tenemos en San Juan Sacatepéquez).

Proforma SmokeHR56882A para cuando se llegue a un nuevo club:

"I am very happy to arrive to this big club, I come here to summarize. My objective is to make an important contribution for this team, which have very important players of international quality. My dream was always to play here in ___________ since I was a child.

Having as great manager as Mr _______ is a pride for me. I will do my best for being part of the goals to be accomplished this year"

Proforma UmbrellaZA89332 para cuando se vaya a jugar un partido importante:

"Sooo...well. They are 3 important points to be played. _______ is a hard opponent, in football there is no small rival, we can´t understimate the adversary.

In football there are 11 versus 11. The current moment of ________ is important, but we have great defenders which will put all their effort to make happy these great supporters. We will go to the field to give everything what we have and to do what the Teacher (?) ordered to us, and with the God´s help we will give a joy to these beautiful supporters."

Proforma Just_in_case JJ609987A para cuando le esté yendo bien y suena para otro equipo:
"So far I only think in ________ and in the next Sunday match versus ________. My head is fully with this team, I had a contract with this great institution and my plan is to accomplish it in order to retribute all the support I had received. Thanks to God the things are happening to me but I have my feet over the floor."

Proforma AsUsual Lost7322109 para cuando pierden un partido:
"Sooo...well. The things did not work to us today. We put all of ourselves in the field, but unfortunately the football is as it is (?) and God wants it in this way. They took advantage of the few opportunities they had, and besides we had some small mistakes. However there is revenge in football, the next Sunday we will give everything in order to place this great team in the position it deserves."
Proforma Frog1922336S para cuando el DT está teniendo malos resultados:
"We understand the supporters impatience, but it is not possible to win always in football. All the group of players is besides the Teacher until death. If the things are not resulting as we want is because our fault and because God wants in this way , not The Teach fault: we the players are who play in the field, not him, and over there (?) we did not respond as he wants."
Proforma FrogII12311Y para cuando sacan al DT por malos resultados
"I prefer not to give an opinion: I am dedicated to play, the decisions are taken by the directors. It is a shame what happened to the Manager Mr _______, but sometimes is better to make changes in order to change the negative dynamics (?). God wants in this way and from now on we have to think in giving the next manager all the support what he request."
Nota: Si el jugador pertenece a los Atletas de Cristo, donde dice "God" cambiar por "The Almighty God, our Lord
".

25 comentarios:

  1. JUAAAAAAAAAAAJUAAAAAAAAA...
    don YSEC esta estuvo máxima, con todo gusto y prontitud estaré reclamando mis regalias(?)....

    ResponderBorrar
  2. Exijo regalías por la proforma Umbrella (?).

    Ya en serio, en realidad de quien es la culpa, de los jugadores o de los periodistas que preguntan siempre las mismas huvonadas?

    ResponderBorrar
  3. creo que ha sido apresurado salir con estas proformas, sobretodo sabiendo que nuestros jugadores colombianos saben tanto del idioma ingles como sabran Juan Miguel Rodriguez y el Chiqui Garcia sobre administracion eficiente de equipos de futbol...

    y no miento, en una entrevista... Humito rodallegua declaró que en ingles solo sabe decir tenkiu!

    ResponderBorrar
  4. "and over there (?) we did not respond as he wants"... me cagoneo de la risa!!!!... jajajajaja... que buen post YSEC, buen 2009 para vos y pal equipo Monserguista.

    saludos!.

    ResponderBorrar
  5. Estoy de acuerdo con Eltharion, nuestros jugadores a duras penas hablan español, difícilmente entenderán la lengua de Esgar Allan Poe (?), por tanto es complicado que compren estas proformas. Entonces creo que la proforma debería ser vendida con su transliteración. Ejemplo:
    Proforma FrogII12311Y
    Ai prefer not tu guiv an opinion: ai am dedicaired tu pley, de decision ar taiquen bai de directors. Itis a shaim wat japened tu de manayer mister____________, bat somtaims is berer tu maik shensh in orer tu shensh de negativ dynamics (?). gad wants in dis güei and from nau on we jav to zink in guiving de necst manayer ol de suppor güat ji ricuest.
    No obstante, también creo que es casi imposible que nuestros jugadores se aprendan lo que tienen que decir o pronunciar, dificil que pronuncien la C, la D, la Z y otros sonidos del ingles; ellos solo saben hacer goles y defender muy bien. Esto me hace pensar en las injusticias de la vida, un futbolista que ni sabe ingles, ni ha estudiado ni miércoles se gana 300.000.000!!!, y nosotros los que estamos aquí, al menos hablamos algo de ingles, estudiamos, somos más calidosos (?) y ni puel pu soñamos con ganarnos esa cifra que se ganará nuestro apreciado Hugol por ejemplo.

    ResponderBorrar
  6. Ruben, lo siento mucho pero la vida es así, uno se la pasa 5 años encerrado en una universidad aprendiendo una profesión, algunos 1 o 2 años mas aprendiendo otro idioma y estos manes por haber nacido con el talento de saberle pegar a un balón se ganan mas de 10 veces lo que nosotros

    ResponderBorrar
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