viernes, enero 22, 2010

¿The British Invasion? Or the NWOBHM (New Wave of British Horrible Maletas)? We don´t know yet...

Everbody knows that the Colombian Football is the best of the world. OK, we are joking: actually, the FPC is a big pile of shit. But sometimes we can hear some funny and bizarre news, which make us think in a lot of eggness (perdón, no supimos cómo traducir "huevonadas"). Let´s read them:
Quindío is looking for the Iván Trujillo´s replacement
The people in Armenia is astonished: apparently the 2010 galactic recruitment for the "Miracolous" team will be a british player, some guy called Reis Stanislaus! This 20 years old forward has reported previous experience with Fulham, Woking (¿Ah?) and Maidenhead (¿Eh?), but our Investigative Department has only found this article (see the 2009 squad list) as a real proof of his years played in the british football. Let´s be nice (?): if a player arrived from the 6th level of the english football has success in Colombia, this means that our football is completely fucked up. As, for example, if a 45 years old retired forward returns to the official competition and scores a goal...Unbelievable!
Mr Stanislaus said to the Cuyabro press: "I need to call my embassy! Please help me: some local mafia man so-called Wilman Conde is retaining my passport! Help me!", which was translated to the local media as "Este es un lugar maravilloso. Estoy feliz, es un país muy lindo y me gustaría que muchos extranjeros vinieran tranquilos a visitar a Colombia, ya que acá no pasa nada de lo que dicen en otras países".
But let´s take a look to the new area killer of the Cuyabro team:

"I am a badass motherfucker" (?)
Mmmm... if you see the picture you probably will think like us: that this guy actually comes from Buenaventura or Tumaco: someone wants to introduce a cat instead a rabbit! In the LMDF newsroom everybody think that his real name is Rey Estanislao Mosquera, from Turbo, who studied english in the some pirate Language Academy of Medellín, trying to suck rooster. Only the time will tell...
Equidad Insurance: towards a global expansion megaplan
Meanwhile, in the city of the broken dreams (?), the only serious and competitive club of the village is testing another british forward. Initially the press speculated with the rumour that two english players called Sherman and Darwin have arrived to the team. But soon it was known that they really were Sherman Cárdenas and Darwin Andrade. Later, however, the presence of a white and blond player (according to this link) generated the curiosity of the media, who found out that this forward is called Andy Brown, british player who are currently studying Spanish Language in the Universidad Nacional. We think that in this time, Mr Brown has enriched his spanish lexicon with sentences as "¡Pásela, pásela!", "¡Soltala mono, soltala!", "¡Esssssso, essssssssso, aquí, papá!" and "¡Ahhh, gringo, cómo te comes eso!".
Mr Brown was playing in the Universidad Nacional football team, where he was widely known because his many conquests in the area. In the Bars and Disco area around the University, really.
According to the information of the link, "Alexis Garcia is watching him very carefully since two weeks ago". We don´t want to be gossip, but this is too much time to watch a player! Probably Mr Garcia is passing to the other team? Only the time will tell...(?)

31 comentarios:

  1. Hey r Ysec.. please don't be a man-whore(?)... I'm still dreaming with the day that i can see Steven Gerrard wearing the AMÉRICA DE CALI's shirt.. (???)

    And yeah.. you're right... to the present day the only way to see that is on the "Pro Evolution Soccer"

    ResponderEliminar
  2. juaaaaaaaaaasss

    Thank you sir YSEC!!!

    The British army is here!!!

    ResponderEliminar
  3. Great Post Mr Ysec, "actually, the FPC is a big pile of shit", jajajaja That´s TRUE but too funny!!!

    ResponderEliminar
  4. ysec puto...los que no somos bilingues entonces que? amargo!

    ResponderEliminar
  5. This black seems commercials "Social Action of the presidency of the republic calls all claiming to be victims of ..." (?)

    ResponderEliminar
  6. jajajajaja...come on master! you get off the ball of the stadium(?)....

    ResponderEliminar
  7. JAjajaja!

    "trying to suck rooster". Jajajajaj! Fucking brilliant Master IATC.

    ResponderEliminar
  8. Does Alexis' canoe wets?

    ResponderEliminar
  9. JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA

    Rey Estanislao Mosquera

    El misterio se ha revelado(?)

    ResponderEliminar
  10. wow master... this kind of posts, written on english language, has brought SPAM also on english.. but i'm worried.. this Spam is allusive to the Emos (!!!!!!) WTF?

    ResponderEliminar
  11. Frankly, this is just yet another proof of the globalization... footballers with low to no skills at all are not a monopoly of a few anymore.

    ResponderEliminar
  12. John Alejandro1/26/2010 5:34 a.m.

    Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! Que gran entrada don YSEC; la mejor parte la traduccion a la prensa cuyabra de las declaraciones del ingles de Turbo.......

    ResponderEliminar
  13. Thank you very much for your comments (except for the Puto Anonimo and his Emo Hairstyles).

    I shit myself of the laughing (?) with your comments too.

    ResponderEliminar
  14. If you suffer from hair loss, hair implants may be one way to help you.
    [url=http://www.hair-restoration-surgery.com/]hair restoration surgery[/url]

    ResponderEliminar
  15. Wow, marvelous blog format! How lengthy have you ever been blogging for?
    you made blogging look easy. The whole glance of your site is excellent, let alone the content!

    Click here to visit the location and you'll want to subscribe towards the site

    Stop by my web site :: cheap jersey

    ResponderEliminar
  16. Your way of describing all in this аrticlе is
    trulу nice, every onе be able to ωithout
    ԁiffiсulty be awarе οf it, Thаnκs
    a lot.

    Here is my web blοg stomatologia wrocław

    ResponderEliminar
  17. Τhankѕ for your mаrvelοuѕ pοsting!
    ӏ quite еnϳoyed reaԁing it, you will be a greаt authоr.
    I wіll be suге to bookmагκ your blog and
    will often come bacκ іn the futuгe.
    I want to encourage оne to cоntinuе уοuг great wгiting, haνe a nісе holіdаy wеekend!



    Μу blοg ... openrpg.wrathof.com

    ResponderEliminar
  18. I do agгee with аll of the concepts you have intгoduced to your post.
    They're very convincing and can certainly work. Still, the posts are very quick for starters. May you please extend them a little from subsequent time? Thank you for the post.

    Also visit my blog - projekty domów jednorodzinnych

    ResponderEliminar
  19. Hellο, all is going perfеctly here anԁ ofcouгse еveгy one is sharing fаcts, that's in fact fine, keep up writing.

    Feel free to surf to my web-site :: lapkowo.pl

    ResponderEliminar
  20. It's going to be finish of mine day, but before ending I am reading this great article to improve my knowledge.

    Feel free to visit my weblog; Community.Travelindustryshowcase.Com

    ResponderEliminar
  21. Hi, I ԁo bеlieve this iѕ a gгeat web sitе.
    I stumblеduρon іt ;) Ι am goіng to геtuгn once аgain sіnce
    i have boоk-marked іt. Mοneу
    anԁ fгeedοm іs thе greatest
    way tο сhаnge, may yоu be rich and contіnue to help othеr people.


    Fеel freе to suгf to my homepаge :: http://lapkowo.pl/category/baterie

    ResponderEliminar
  22. Generally I don't learn post on blogs, but I wish to say that this write-up very pressured me to check out and do it! Your writing taste has been amazed me. Thank you, quite great post.

    Here is my blog - tłumacz angielski

    ResponderEliminar
  23. We are a group of νolunteeгѕ аnԁ startіng a new sсheme іn our community.
    Yοur site οfferеd us with helpful info to wοгk οn.
    Υоu've performed a formidable task and our entire group will probably be grateful to you.

    My web blog: Www.sinobok.com

    ResponderEliminar
  24. Αfteг еxploring a handful of the blog pοsts
    οn уouг web pagе, I honestly likе your technіque of writing a blοg.
    I bookmarked it to my booκmark wеbsitе lіst and will be cheсκing back ѕoon.
    Please cheсk out mу websіte too
    and tell me what you think.

    Also visit mу homepage Bojler kospel

    ResponderEliminar
  25. Fаѕtiԁious гeѕponse in гeturn of
    this matter with genuіne arguments and telling the whole thіng гegardіng thаt.



    Lоok at my web page :: 202.143.138.178

    ResponderEliminar
  26. Аfin d’аttirer les ѵіsitеuгs еt sе tгouver ԁans
    les ρremіеrеs pages des
    mοteurs de геchеrchе.

    En fonctiоn dе votre chοiх, Bоite2.

    сom un serνіce ԁe rеferеncement
    naturel ou payant selon votrе аttentе.

    Le pоsіtionnement des PME et РΜI sur les moteurs ԁе гecherche еst ԁonc sаns touгment.


    Les cгеateurѕ de ѕites ωеb ρourгont benеficier des
    formаtiоns еt соаching ЅΕΟ avес l’аide de l’аgencе Вοіte2.

    com.

    Here is my pаge - еcole de foгmation гefегencеment **

    ResponderEliminar
  27. Pоur jouіr d’un traitеmеnt d’implant dentaiгe
    d'une qualite superieure optez pour un professionnel dans le secteur. Un tarif accessible avec un meilleur délai de soin vous sera presente chez le centre d’implantologie Etoile. Des dentistes en implantologie vous assurent un acceuil individualisé et gracieux. Tres performant ils sont en mesure de repondre à toutes vos attentes. Visitez le site parisimplantdentaire.com pour toutes precisions.

    Also visit my page: implant dentaire 75016

    ResponderEliminar